CRAZY TALK

ON THE SEVENTEENTH DAY OF CRANKVENT... TOXIC NOG

A tall glass of egg nog? Don't mind if I do! A mince pie or three? Yes please! Some Christmas pud? Oh boy!

Mm-mmm, Christmas foods and their wonderful spices. Cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg, more nutmeg, yes sprinkle a bit more on, go on... wait a minute. Nutmeg - the same spice that can induce nausea, dizziness, hallucinations, and a general slow-down of brain functions? Are you trying to poison me?!

OK so you'd have to take about two tablespoons of the stuff for it to have a noticeable effect, but I'm keeping an eye on you, nog-peddler... 

Not even nomming your nog from a cup carved of rhino horn will protect you from dangerous, delicious nutmeg! Mainly because the whole anti-poison rhino horn thing is a big fat fib, you idiots. Leave the rhinos alone! Cup of Rhinoceros Horn - antidote to poisons, and for fevers and leprosy. Image number L0005085, Wellcome Library, London.

Not even nomming your nog from a cup carved of rhino horn will protect you from dangerous, delicious nutmeg! Mainly because the whole anti-poison rhino horn thing is a big fat fib, you idiots. Leave the rhinos alone! Cup of Rhinoceros Horn - antidote to poisons, and for fevers and leprosy. Image number L0005085, Wellcome Library, London.