mince pies

TRIFLES

ON THE TWENTY-FIFTH DAY OF CRANKVENT... MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOODNIGHT

Phew these virtual advents are so DAILY. What a slog! But now we can all breathe a happy and contented sigh of relief and sleep off the Christmas nog or fight over the last mince pie.

May all you lovely cranks have a brilliant, shiny 2015 relatively (but not totally) free of petty annoyances, obscure conspiracy theories and goat-getters. Thank you for all your two bits and grizzles and minor points of order, as well as your retweets and reposts. See you in the New Year, pedants!

It is not ENTIRELY clear what is going on in this image and it might in fact be terribly racist but hopefully ghost Disraeli is pointing out to Gladstone how nice it is to welcome persons of all nations to join in our bountiful repast, but probably he is just pointing out that Gladstone wasn't invited. [ A political cartoon depicting William Gladstone as Charles Dickens' Scrooge. He is being shown a vision by Benjamin Disraeli as one of the Christmas ghosts of Queen Victoria sharing Christmas dinner with people from different parts of the British Empire including India, Africa, the Caribbean, Asia and North America ]. Lithograph by Tom Merry published in  St Stephen's Review , 25 December 1886. Wellcome Library, reference no. 565025i, online image no. V0050360.

It is not ENTIRELY clear what is going on in this image and it might in fact be terribly racist but hopefully ghost Disraeli is pointing out to Gladstone how nice it is to welcome persons of all nations to join in our bountiful repast, but probably he is just pointing out that Gladstone wasn't invited. [A political cartoon depicting William Gladstone as Charles Dickens' Scrooge. He is being shown a vision by Benjamin Disraeli as one of the Christmas ghosts of Queen Victoria sharing Christmas dinner with people from different parts of the British Empire including India, Africa, the Caribbean, Asia and North America]. Lithograph by Tom Merry published in St Stephen's Review, 25 December 1886. Wellcome Library, reference no. 565025i, online image no. V0050360.

CRAZY TALK

ON THE SEVENTEENTH DAY OF CRANKVENT... TOXIC NOG

A tall glass of egg nog? Don't mind if I do! A mince pie or three? Yes please! Some Christmas pud? Oh boy!

Mm-mmm, Christmas foods and their wonderful spices. Cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg, more nutmeg, yes sprinkle a bit more on, go on... wait a minute. Nutmeg - the same spice that can induce nausea, dizziness, hallucinations, and a general slow-down of brain functions? Are you trying to poison me?!

OK so you'd have to take about two tablespoons of the stuff for it to have a noticeable effect, but I'm keeping an eye on you, nog-peddler... 

Not even nomming your nog from a cup carved of rhino horn will protect you from dangerous, delicious nutmeg! Mainly because the whole anti-poison rhino horn thing is a big fat fib, you idiots. Leave the rhinos alone!  Cup of Rhinoceros Horn - antidote to poisons, and for fevers and leprosy . Image number L0005085, Wellcome Library, London.

Not even nomming your nog from a cup carved of rhino horn will protect you from dangerous, delicious nutmeg! Mainly because the whole anti-poison rhino horn thing is a big fat fib, you idiots. Leave the rhinos alone! Cup of Rhinoceros Horn - antidote to poisons, and for fevers and leprosy. Image number L0005085, Wellcome Library, London.